It's a wonderful way to live, and not a bad way to go, either. The average Frenchman is still smiling three months after he's dead.

I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.

Four of us slept in the one bed. When it got cold, mother threw on another brother.

I just hope I don't have to explain all the times I've used His name in vain when I get up there.

I'd give up golf if I didn't have so many sweaters.

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom.

Sure Vietnam is a dirty war. I've never heard of a clean one.