Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.

It's so cold here in Washington, D.C., that politicians have their hands in their own pockets.

To give you an idea of how fast we travelled - we left with two rabbits and when we arrived we still had only two.

Culture is the ability to describe Jane Russell without moving your hands

The last time I played golf with President Ford he hit a birdie. And an eagle, a moose, an elk, an aardvark...

I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.

It's a wonderful world. It may destroy itself but you'll be able to watch it all on TV.