Having so many gold courses so close together was ideal for me. With my slice I could enjoy three or four golf courses at the same time.

I've been playing golf a long time, although it's not really true that on my first round they strapped my bag on the back of a dinosaur.

I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it's silly to let the game get to you. When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I'm breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That's what gives me the strength to break the club.

When you get over 95, every day is your day.

Jack Benny really liked my book. I know because he called me up from the library and told me.

As soon as the war ended, we located the one spot on earth that hadn't been touched by the war and blew it to hell.

Congress may be going home for the holidays soon. How can you beat a Christmas gift like that?