My old friend Jack Benny has only had one ball all his golfing life. And now he's lost it. The string came off!

I was there. I saw your sons and your husbands, your brothers and your sweethearts. I saw how they worked, played, fought, and lived. I saw some of them die. I saw more courage, more good humor in the face of discomfort, more love in an era of hate and more devotion to duty than could exist under tyranny.

I'll tell 'ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people.

I knew the President would run for reelection in 1984. Why not? Actors love sequels ... and returns.

My old friend Jack Benny has only had one ball all his golfing life. And now he's lost it. The string came off!

And on nearby islands, the Japanese army was eating raw fish. We felt sorry for them. We didn't know that in America after the war, you wouldn't be able to get into a sushi joint without a reservation. And we thought they lost.

I ruined my hands in the ring. The referee kept stepping on them.