There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus.
He took his misfortune like a man - he blamed it on his wife.
It is always dullest before the yawn.
Teenagers complain there's nothing to do, then stay out all night doing it.
If you want your wife to listen to you, talk to another woman.
The person who knows everything has the most to learn.