The only thing I envy in young people is their livers.

A general and a bit of shooting makes you forget your troubles ... it takes your mind off the cost of living.

The terrorist is the one with the small bomb.

There's no bad publicity except an obituary.

Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.

The English and Americans dislike only some Irish--the same Irish that the Irish themselves detest, Irish writers--the ones that think.

I am a drinker with writing problems.