There's no one, no one, loves you like yourself.

One drink is to many for me and a thousand not enough.

A general and a bit of shooting makes you forget your troubles ... it takes your mind off the cost of living.

I have never seen a situation so dismal that a policeman couldn't make it worse.

I cannot imagine any crime worse than taking a life, can you? -It'd depend whose life.

Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it's done, they've seen it done every day, but they're unable to do it themselves.

No man can discover his own talents.