Dee Dee Dee dosen't mean mentally retarded. It means stupid. This song goes out to all the stupid people out there. Your gonna find this song hilarious, and you don't even know it's about you.

Listen, here's my questions to anybody when they talk about comedy. When you are with your friends who don't judge you, what do you say? And if that's appropriate to say with your friends, why is it not appropriate anywhere else. Like I hate those people who judge me and are hypocrites.

Here, let's go to my dressing room, and I promise, I'll only put it in for a second.

If God made Adam and Eve, they had children... wait a minute... that means someone banged their sister!

I'll know America is in bad shape when Cubans in Miami get in the water and swim back to Cuba.

I don't have the time to steal other people's material even if I wanted to. The reason why these rumors got started is that I don't really contest them because I don't believe they deserve contesting. I really don't.

Like my father I, too, was born in Central America - Nebraska.