If you ran a delicatessen store, you would want to be the best delicatessen store, wouldn't you? Well, that's how I feel about the Yankees.

They say Yogi Berra is funny. Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. What's funny about that?

The Mets has come along slow, but fast!

Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.

The way our luck has been lately, our fellas have been getting hurt on their days off.

I love signing autographs. I'll sign anything but veal cutlets. My ballpoint slips on veal cutlets.

Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It's staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in.