If all babies are so cute, how the hell do we have so many ugly people in the world?

They run like deer, jump like deer and think like deer.

If you are an ugly woman, you have no chance of getting a TV job.

I don't mess with that cat. I'm pretty sure he carries a blade under his jersey.

Hey Steve, no offense, but if you couldn't shoot, there would be no reason for you to be alive.

I don't believe athletes should be role models. . . . We're a one-shot deal, one in a million, so we should be the least likely role models. . . . I think one of the problems in society today is that we don't stress education enough, because we glorify athletes, actors and actresses.

I never would say a player stinks. Ever. I'll tell you their team stinks, and first of all, they know their team stinks. And the fans know their team stinks.