Every time I hear the word conservative it makes me sick to my stomach.

Jerry Krause must have pictures of his boss's wife having sex with a monkey.

If all babies are so cute, how the hell do we have so many ugly people in the world?

Just because you say something doesn't make it controversial, and it doesn't make you a bad person.

I'm not a role model... Just because I dunk a basketball doesn't mean I should raise your kids.

I don't know what that gas is made of, but it can't smell any worse than Ernie Johnson 's gym bag.

The main thing to do is relax and let your talent do the work.