You know what I always say about basketball whenever anybody tried to tell me the Knicks are gonna be good: They're old. Old people don't get healthy. They die.

They always try to make it like jocks discriminate against gay people. I've been a big proponent of gay marriage for a long time, because as a black person, I can't be in for any form of discrimination at all.

Most sportswriters don't know their ass from a hole in the ground.

If Michael Jordan was a damn plumber, he couldn't get a date. Any guy got $500 million looks good.

Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cause you were too close, kissing his!

People always say he can run and he can jump. So can a deer and you wouldn't put a deer in the game.

It's kinda great to see the Celtics doin well again cuz that was so much fun in my day to go to the Boston Garden and they spit at you and throw things at you and talk about your mom. It sounds like dinner at Kenny Smith's house.