I have been on a life-long search of how to stay in shape without putting any effort into it whatsoever.

I think it's important to be authentic to who you are, and if you're inauthentic at all, people smell that from a mile away.

Another thing I take issue with are people who take their dogs on "play dates," or even worse, people who choose to dress their dogs up in outfits better suited for homosexuals participating in a gay pride parade. Dog costumes are right up there with something else I find particularly offensive: sweater vests.

I think reality television, unless it's inspirational, which it very rarely is, I think it's embarrassing. It's embarrassing state of affairs that we're in.

I was in a tailspin of confusion I hadn't experienced since the first time I heard George W. Bush speak.

This women/ killer was a testament to my theory that the crazier you are, the more calories you burn. That's why psychos are always so skinny.

I look hot and, most of all, skinny. I love the day after throwing up. I felt like a feather.