If you want to feel a certain way, feel it now.
The quality of your life is determined by the focus of your attention.
It doesn't matter what did or did not happen then. It only matters what happens NOW.
People respond better to kindness than cruelty. Why, it's even caught on in the workplace, that bastion of self-hatred and disrespect.
It takes a tremendous act of courage to admit to yourself that you are not defective in any way whatsoever.
Self-judgment is how conditioned mind keeps control over your life.