If you buy a book on golf instruction buy the thinnest book you can find. The thinner the book, chances are the easier and more elementary the instruction. It can do one of two things: help you more or hurt you less. Both are good compared to the alternative.

The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.

Then Lee Trevino and Jack Nicklaus come in. I'll caddie for Jack.

I am a millionaire today and my wife deserves all of the credit. Before I met her I was a multi-millionaire.

Somebody give me a banana. I'm playing like a monkey, so I might as well eat like one.

Trevino is in a league by himself. We don't even count him. We figure when you come in second, you're a winner.

I don't fear death, but I sure don't like those three-footers for par.