Trevino is in a league by himself. We don't even count him. We figure when you come in second, you're a winner.

I don't fear death, but I sure don't like those three-footers for par.

When I used to gamble, I looked for players with head covers on their irons. Those guys I could beat.

Playing golf is not hot work. Cutting sugar cane for a dollar a day - that's hot work. Hotter than my first wrist watch.

I have 13 dependents. All of them have 140 IQ or better, except me. I'm under 100 IQ, and I support them all.

Golf is the only sport that a professional can enjoy playing with his friends.

A golf ball is like a clock. Always hit it at 6 o'clock and make it go toward 12 o'clock. But make sure you're in the same time zone.