I was on the dance floor but I couldn't hear the band.
Jack Nicklaus is a legend in his spare time.
When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income.
When I used to gamble, I looked for players with head covers on their irons. Those guys I could beat.
A golf ball is like a clock. Always hit it at 6 o'clock and make it go toward 12 o'clock. But make sure you're in the same time zone.
The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life.