We've got stained glass windows in our house; it's those damned pigeons.

The police stopped me when I was out in my car. They told me it was a spot check. I admitted to two pimples and a boil.

We've got stained glass windows in our house; it's those damned pigeons.

I rang the bell of this small bed-and breakfast place, whereupon a lady appeared at an outside window. "What do you want?", she asked. "I want to stay here", I replied. "Well, stay there then", she said and closed the window.

I won't say I was slow developer, but our teacher was quite pleased to have someone her own age in the class to talk to.

There's a new slimming course just out where they remove all your bones. Not only do you weigh less, but you also look so much more relaxed.

My sister wanted a cat for a pet... I wanted a dog, so they bought a cat and taught it to bark.