People need a time to laugh. It's up to us to bonk ourselves on the head and slip on a banana peel so the average guy can say, 'I may be bad, honey, but I'm not as much of an idiot as that guy on the screen.'

I live in a VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER.

Brothers don't shake hands. Brothers gotta hug.

The point is, how do you know the Guarantee Fairy isn't a crazy glue sniffer.

Basically, I only play one character; I just play him at different volumes.

I have what doctors call a little bit of a weight problem.

In the land of the skunk the man with half a nose is king!