You don't hurry a thinker, and you don't talk to him when he's thinking. It's just inconsiderate.

Life is messy. Would that every puzzle piece fell into place, every word was kind, every accident happy, but such is not the case. Life is messy

This is the man who called the fire department when the toilet backed up, and I'm asking him for help. What was I thinking? Why am I attracted to weak men?

That's the difference between irony and sarcasm. Irony can be spontaneous, while sarcasm requires volition. You have to create sarcasm.

It’s like he has this power over me—like I have an eating disorder and he’s a package of Oreo Double Stuff cookies.

That's the scary thing about hope," she said. "If you let it go too long it turns into faith.

Only cops and vampires have to have an invitation to enter.