Don't bruise the Foo!

Actually, orcas aren't quite as complex as scientists imagine. Most killer whales are just four tons of doofus dressed up like a police car.

Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There’s no such place.

She's evil. Evil, evil, evil. I want to see her naked.

This story is not and never was meant to challenge anyone's faith; however, if one's faith can be shaken by stories in a humorous novel, one may have a bit more praying to do.

I think I'm what they call a never-was.

He invented Kung Fu when translated to English means method by which short, bald guys can kick the bejeezus out of you.