I think I identify more with the smart guy, but most people might take umbrage at that. I like to think of myself as a real thinker, but I suppose people might beg to differ.

People's - most people's job is talking about the future or like money not even in the present tense. It's not even paper.

With comedians, you have that understanding that we're trying to get laughs.

I would say most comedians have a very cynical worldview of the way the world can work. It's almost like if you didn't, you couldn't be a comedian.

Humanity is a crazy contradiction. I accept us for who we are. We're not that great. Every time we take a step forward we go back to the same primitive behavior. We're meant to be this way. It's not our fault, it's just who we are.

The earth is a used Kleenex on the universe's nightstand.

I'm just another guy who thinks he's smarter than he is, in a long line of them.