People say history was written by the winners. No, it wasn't. It was written by the bullies.

It’s sad. Marxism didn’t work. Communism didn’t work. Capitalism doesn’t work. Nothing works. Even democracy doesn’t work. Democracy-the greatest form of government and we have two choices for who’s our leader. In fascism you only have one choice. That’s great. We have one more choice than the worst form of government.

I've been to Japan, I've been to China, I've been to Africa, I've been to the Middle East, I've been to Europe a little bit. I've never been to South America.

I think people tend to feel odd when I do my act. Unless you are an ironic person, it's not a good place for you to be.

I'm not a big method actor. I'm much more superficial.

I'm quietly becoming New York's premiere actor. People don't understand. They have me pigeon-holed as a comedian.

Somehow, it was so happy a time. Those early days of comedy are when you get addicted to it.