I'm quietly becoming New York's premiere actor. People don't understand. They have me pigeon-holed as a comedian.

The earth is a used Kleenex on the universe's nightstand.

I write all the time - I write poetry, I love to write

The only people who like to live alone more than comics are priests.

It was tumultuous, it was crazy, but I would not trade it for anything.

I would say most comedians have a very cynical worldview of the way the world can work. It's almost like if you didn't, you couldn't be a comedian.

I used to love the election season'cause it's kind of fun. Everyone makes a big sport out of it with all these different news stories and everything. I like it better now that everybody knows all the candidates from the past 15 years. But it does get really ugly. It's ugly and it's pugilist.