Democrats are calling Christine O'Donnell 'the Sarah Palin of the East.' Really? She's a loud, emotionally unstable woman from Delaware. That's not Sarah Palin, that's Joe Biden.

People are saying that Anderson Cooper could be the new Oprah. And then these people are struck by lightning.

Aphrodisiacs come in many forms: food, drink, the internet.

Harry Potter, he sends a message on Owl Mail while us poor old muggles have to make do with instantaneous emails and texting. Oh, if only we could be like you Harry Potter, with your four day owl delivery!

Being an American is something I wanted to be for a very long time, probably since I saw the moon landing when I was a child.

You know when you're a kid and you think, 'Oh no, I've got double math, this is never gonna end,' but then it ends, and it's like it never happened? That's like life.

There is no Thanksgiving back in the old country where I come from. You know why? Because being thankful is a sin.