I'm so excited about the new iPad, I just iPeed my iPants.

Now, I know Obama was trying to take the long view, but talking about solar energy in the middle of the oil spill is like watching your house engulfed in flames and saying, 'We really should change the curtains.'

Historically, when Americans don't know what to do next, they go to Paris. Benjamin Franklin is like: 'What am I going to do now? I'll go to Paris!'

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with telling the truth. I know it isn’t fashionable.

I'm careful with money.

A new restaurant here in Southern California requires women to wear high heels. I'm outraged! This is sexist! Why just the women?

Time is only linear for engineers and referees.