Why don't they allow professional wrestling at the Olympics? They allow pro basketball players and hockey players. Olympic pro wrestling would be awesome. The team from Mexico could wear those Mr. X masks. The French wrestler could hit his opponent with a baguette. Or perhaps just surrender.

There's just a feeling you get from certain things you do in life that just kind of feel pure and independent of what's actually, physically, going on.

When I went out on tour as Bing Hitler I would hook up with Lenny and we'd get drunk together. He was always very supportive. He was a big star and a lot of what he said to me had power and impact. Apart from that, I just like him.

It is Veterans Day, when we honor everyone who served in all of the campaigns. We honor them with dignity and respect, and of course mattress sales and tire discounts.

Stand by your bed and salute me.

I think holidays create so much pressure because people feel they should be having a good time. But you shouldn't.

There is no Thanksgiving back in the old country where I come from. You know why? Because being thankful is a sin.