I come from a very critical culture. You know the Scots. They're always saying: 'Oh, no. It will never work. You'll never amount to anything. You've got to know your place in the world.

Twas the night before Thanksgiving.

I used to believe, like many people who come from poor backgrounds, that it gave me an edge, but I think that's just something we have to tell ourselves to get by sometimes. I don't believe that anymore. Children of privilege can be just as talented and clever as anybody else.

My mother was tickled and I think kind of proud when my father got hit on my an attractive middle-aged Asian lady who hadn't noticed he was with his family. He was certainly pleased about it.

Gas prices - it is $6 a gallon here. People in L.A. are furious. You can't tell, of course, because of the Botox.

A number of U.S. colleges are going to start having dorms for alcoholics. I believe those are called dorms.

Dell Computers announced they're releasing a competitor for the iPad. Now it is, in fact, a great alternative for people who already have an iPad, but are fed up with it working all the time.