Rush Limbaugh says if the health care bill passes, he will leave the country. The Democrats are upset, because if they knew that, they would have passed the bill years ago.

Now, I know Obama was trying to take the long view, but talking about solar energy in the middle of the oil spill is like watching your house engulfed in flames and saying, 'We really should change the curtains.'

I think comedy as an art involves the audience as a participant as much as is involves the artist.

A friend of mine that I was in a band with started me on Kafka, which in turn led to Camus and Sartre.

Even though it's warm here in L.A., people still have to wear layers - at least until their plastic surgery heals.

The most popular Valentine's Day gift is chocolate. In the 1800's, doctors told their patients to eat chocolate to get over a broken heart. They also thought if you're going to be alone, who cares if you get fat.

Being funny is a gift, and, when done well, is an art form.