It's fantastic that Congress has an increasing number of women. Experts call an increasingly female presence in a previously male space 'the Bruce Jenner effect.'

Being an American is something I wanted to be for a very long time, probably since I saw the moon landing when I was a child.

A new restaurant here in Southern California requires women to wear high heels. I'm outraged! This is sexist! Why just the women?

Sometimes people think you’re smart if you question the status quo, if nothing else.

Last night on the show I had Olympics fever. Unfortunately, it's getting worse. That's not good. I have to call my doctor if my torch burns for more than four hours.

You know, where I come from, an antique, to be called an antique, it has to be at least a hundred years old. That's a law: before you can call something an antique, it has to be a hundred years old. In L.A., something that's been around for a couple of weeks is an antique. It's true! People are like, Look at this old-fashioned iPod. Look at this! It's the size of a man's hand! Ha ha ha ha. Back then-back then, people thought Mel Gibson was just acting crazy. It was a very different time.

She still cared for me, and the best way I could make amends to her was to be happy. I do have a knack for finding great women.