That's why I believe in a Constitution which separates church from state. I've seen what happens when they get in cahoots.

I think people are as individual as snowflakes, they kinda look alike but no two are the exactly the same, and all classification is the root of prejudice.

There's going to be a new cable-TV channel for dogs. Dogs don't even watch TV. But the schedule came out today. And they've got great shows, like Barks & Recreation and Game of Bones.

Wait! Don't applaud my cheapness! I've got other crap I need help with!

Here in Los Angeles, school's out for summer. For thousands of school kids, this is the first week of summer vacation. And for thousands of parents, it's the first week of hell.

Confession is a sacred rite enhanced by allegory, exaggeration, and lies.

You can never talk religion on network TV. It makes too many people angry. You can talk about sex.