I always tell people I romanticize about doing something simple, like doing radio in northern California.

I don't do well around the angry, bitter and emotionally fragile among us, which may eliminate 70% of the population.

George W. Bush even stopped in Pennsylvania to try his hand at the lotto and gave up when he could only think of the numbers 4 and 17

President Bush is trying to put a positive spin on the latest bad economic numbers. Today he declared victory in the 'War on Jobs.'

Howard Dean is narrowing the field of potential running mates. It's down to Mike Tyson or Bobby Knight.

Boeing is working on an invisible fighter jet so nobody can see who's flying it. Didn't George Bush fly this in the National Guard, I believe?

Over ten thousand people have signed a petition to recall Governor Schwarzenegger. I'm sorry, that is next year's joke.