My brother asked me once, 'Are you a misanthrope?' And I said, 'No, I just find people irritating.'

Larry Flynt, running for governor of California. His goal - change our state bird to the spread eagle.

Here in California, one candidate for governor is a 100-year-old woman. She's going door-to-door and asking one simple question - 'Do I live here?'

President Bush is in the hot seat over Iraqi pre-war intelligence. Remember the good ol' days when the only thing the president was trying to cover up was a stain?

Bryant Gumbel is thrilled about his CBS deal and can't wait to start alienating the staff of an entirely new network.

I enjoyed retirement the right way linguine con vongole, red wine and plenty of truffle cheese.

The big political news, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor of California, and already, people are chanting, 'Four more vowels, four more vowels.