Oh, everything's too damned expensive these days. This Bible cost 15 bucks! And talk about a preachy book! Everybody's a sinner! Except this guy.

The humor is essentially dark for a cartoon and sophisticated. But at the same time, being a cartoon gives the writers more freedom than in a normal sitcom. It always pushes the line that, despite human failings, the Simpsons are really decent people.

If something goes wrong at the plant, blame the guy who can't speak English.

After years of doing it, you learn the difference between your ego and your opinion. When you're married you have to cut through that.

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.

If I were actually Homer Simpson, I'd be getting scripts out the wazoo.

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?