What happens in Vegas, I'm telling everyone.

Video games don't make people go nuts. I played Super Mario forever. Not once hopping on a turtle or smash my head through a brick ceiling.

I always wanted to do a B&E. Not bacon and eggs. Although I could always go for bacon and eggs. I'm talking about breaking in and entering.

It's not for any purpose such as religion, health, or things like that, I just never felt I had the need or want to drink or do drugs.

I feel like people who don't brag are trying to make you jealous by thinking they're hiding something more even exciting.

If you think your demeanor is mellow or not particularly charismatic, the material can life you higher. So write everyday, and get onstage or in a coffee shop where they are doing open mice, anywhere you can perform even if that means starting your own open mic night - and be your own self.

I'm bringing back the skinny tie but wearing it tied around my balls.