I was very good at kickball ... I was wonderful at ah doing that kick and your leg goes up and your shoe went on top of the school

Every joke has its origin - the punching people in the face joke. It hurts like hell to get punched in the face.

You can't teach an old hater new truths.

Some people have constipation of the brain but their mouth has the runs.

Created a word game to play with a person you're fighting with. Silent Treatment. Nothing happens until one of you quietly says, Hey, you hungry?

It's not for any purpose such as religion, health, or things like that, I just never felt I had the need or want to drink or do drugs.

You are the director of your own life story. Don't cast idiots or people will walk out during your 2nd act.