I’m reminded of a book my father used to read me,” she said. “A bunch of elves and things get into a huge war over a piece of jewelry that everybody wants but nobody can wear.

He who hesitates is lost

I think there are probably just as many adults who would miss the humor of my books, if not more, as there are children.

Having an aura of menace is like having a pet weasel, because you rarely meet someone who has one, and when you do, it makes you want to hide under the coffee table.

Sometimes, even the best of plans will occur to you when it is too late.

The rinsed foam swirled into one drain that always clogged come October when the maples dropped Canadian propaganda over everything.

Like a lot of people whose children were small in the 2000s, I read [Daniel Handler] books out loud and I loved them.