I will love you as misfortune loves orphans, as fire loves innocence, and as justice loves to sit and watch while everything goes wrong.
Daniel HandlerWe need things, and the opposite of them, and we are so rarely completely comfortable.
Daniel HandlerYou can invent things like automatic popcorn poppers. You can invent things like steam-powered window washers. But you canโt invent more time.
Daniel HandlerEveryone on earth would never starve and forever find love and happiness, since we won, but if weโd lost, they would have gouged out our eyes and thrown us naked onto hot coals and poisonous snakes for all the cheering and hugging at the end, strangers hugging like the end of The Omega Virus when Steve Sturmine finds the antidote.
Daniel Handler