It's not Spring Break until somebody dies!

Slutiness is a very underrated quality in a girl.

The only advice I have for youth is to date outside your race. I just think it's so cute when I see little kids in interracial relationships; it makes me feel like I'm watching a commercial.

The flat-brimmed cap is the modern day dunce cap.

I'm not a racist or misogynist person, but I find these jokes funny, so I say them.

If you like soccer, then welcome to America. See, our country already has entertainment so watching people chase a ball for four hours to end 0 - 0 is not enjoyable - unless, of course, the bleachers collapse and half of Europe dies.

The day I notice a cyclist obey a stop sign is the day I'll stop enjoying watching them bounce off my hood.