I'm very romantic when I masturbate. Sometimes I light a candle...then I try and shoot it out. It's like a carnival.

You know what wakes me up? A tongue in the ass. There is no alarm clock on that one, you are up, you are shaking, you are in a karate stance.....the day has begun.

You ever make fun of someone so much, you think you should thank them for all the good times you've had?

Even now, as we speak, people are having sex with animals. And we wonder why the animals attack us.

Women have all the power because women have all the vaginas.

Once you get offstage you're just like everyone else, and everyone else can get into a fight.

A lot of these kids I think are more content just to be on Facebook and the computer than they are to actually go out. They just really want to get a picture to post to their buddies, and that's about it.