Sometimes. I get recognized, but I'm not really a famous famous. I'm pretty low on the showbiz totem pole - I mean, I'm no Jon or Kate plus eight. I'm just a comic, not a baby factory.

Let's say you're in a situation where crystal meth can help you. Like, I don't know, you have too many teeth.

I masturbate! I do it like I think if I keep doing it, I'm gonna win something.

Remember when you're young and you think your dad is Superman? And then you grow up and realized he's just a drunk who wears a cape.

Jesse Joyce is a great writer.

I feel like soundtrack music is almost like seeing the movie again, but with my ears.

I've never had a surprise birthday party. I've had every other type of surprise. I've had surprise beatings, surprise drug tests, surprise daughter I think.