If I had a kid, I'd give him a name that would make everyone would want to say his name. I'd call him, Pizza-Pussy-Santa. I would! Cause everybody likes one of those things.

You ever make fun of someone so much, you think you should thank them for all the good times you've had?

I get recognized, but I'm not really a famous famous.

I gotta quit smoking, doctor's orders, and the drinking, court orders.

I like doing stand-up and I love putting out TV specials.

Pre-mature ejaculation. Let's talk about it. Premature ejaculation. That's a pretty fancy term for, "Ooooooh Oh no. This has never happened before."

I have soundtracks for a lot of stuff.