At certain times each year, we journalists do almost nothing except apply for the Pulitzers and several dozen other major prizes. During these times you could walk right into most newsrooms and commit a multiple axe murder naked, and it wouldn't get reported in the paper because the reporters and editors would all be too busy filling out prize applications.
Dave BarryThe information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.
Dave BarryThe first animals to be successfully domesticated were dogs, which were a big help because they would bark all night and fetch thrown sticks, thereby freeing humans from having to perform these tedious yet vital tasks.
Dave BarryYou have to be careful on the deck, because of the "hatches," which are holes placed around a sailboat at random to increase the insurance rates.
Dave Barry