I adore dogs to the extent I think they are much more important than human beings. I like your dog much more than I like you.

That's the trouble with Nick. The only time he opens his mouth is to change feet.

Playing Augusta is like playing a Salvador Dali landscape. I expected a clock to fall out of the trees and hit me in the face.

The course is so long, I had to take the curvature of the Earth into consideration.

I lost 150 lbs. if you include my wife.

I was swinging like a toilet door on a prawn trawler.

Being bipolar and an addict and an alcoholic I have to keep myself very busy. I don't sleep. I am lucky if I get three hours of sleep a night, and so I get up, and my head is full of slamming doors.