Did you hear what the Republicans have said about Hillary Clinton? They say she's too angry to be president. Hillary Clinton, Senator Hillary Clinton, too angry to be president. When she heard this, Hillary said, 'Oh yeah? I'll rip your throats out, you bastards.'

Krispy Kreme Doughnuts, everybody loves them. But I thought this was interesting on the box, 'Konsult Kardiologist.

Hillary has now erased all of her emails, and she also had all of her pantsuits dry cleaned.

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host.

Those North Korean hackers are at it again. Earlier today they leaked Santa's naughty list.

President Bush is going to establish elections there in Iraq. He's going to rebuild the infrastructure. He's going to create jobs. He said if it works there, he'll try it here.

I'm still here. I knocked off another competitor.