Mayor de Blasio wants to eliminate garbage. He believes New York City produces way too much garbage. Well, heck, forget about producing too much garbage. What about late-night talk shows?

Iraqi's minister of information did not show up for his press conference today. However, he claims he was there and he said it went very well.

Congratulations to Saddam Hussein on being elected to another seven-year term. It was very close. He received 99 percent of the vote, and one percent of the vote went for last-minute candidate Frank Lautenberg.

It's disappointing when you finally get to meet someone you admire and he conducts himself as a jerk.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is now governor of California. He is a very shrewd man - he already has all of his sex scandals behind him.

Back when we started this show, the hottest program on television was 'Keeping Up With the Gabors.'

A small handgun makes any TV remote control.