My good friend Paul Shaffer and I are going to continue in show business. Next month Paul and I will debut our new act at Caesar's Palace with our white tigers.

It was stupid behaviour. And you take a look at the explosion, and it knocks you down and you wake up every morning and you're scared and you're depressed and sad, and you kind of got to let that knock you down and knock you down.

My political position is that I'm happy to be alive and in North America.

Ladies and gentlemen, after what I've been through, I am happy just to be wearing clothes that open in the front.

Rick Perry has now accused Mitt Romney of hiring illegal aliens to work on his hair.

The first presidential debate was down in Florida. Residents spent all day putting plywood on their televisions.

Life experience is the best teacher.