God forbid I should be the last one to criticize, but I think may be Howard Dean has a bit of a problem because earlier today during a debate in New Hampshire, he bit off Joe Lieberman's ear.

We thought New York City was home to 8 million rats. Turns out, that's a little high. The actual number is 2 million rats. That explains the light turnout for the midterm elections.

Hookers in Times Square, God bless 'em, are offering a Mitt Romney Special. For an extra $20 they'll change positions.

George Clooney is on the program tonight. Next week at this time I will be in a hardware store watching them mix paint.

President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does this guy wind?

Last night we had Bill Clinton, the former president. Security was as tight as Governor Christie's yoga pants.

Back when we started this show, the hottest program on television was 'Keeping Up With the Gabors.'