I have found that the only thing that does bring you happiness is doing something good for somebody who is incapable of doing it for themselves.

How would Trump travel as president? Obviously, he'd use Hair Force One.

Iraq is so bad that President Obama phoned Hillary Clinton and asked her if she could start early.

They're talking about putting a woman on the $20 bill. And Hillary said, 'I'm available.'

Congratulations are in order for Woody Allen - he and Soon Yi have a brand new baby daughter. It's all part of Woody's plan to grow his own wives.

Love: You can't start it like a car, you can't stop it with a gun.

Obama took a tour of the Great Wall of China and said, 'We need one of these things around the White House.'