You probably heard about the big prisoner swap with Cuba. A man who has been incarcerated in Havana for five years is back home in the United States. And we sent them some prisoners. The deal still has to be approved by President Obama and Bud Selig.

President Obama is in China. Today he visited the kids who make our cellphones.

Child labor, not a problem. Censorship, not a problem. Torture, not a problem. Chewing gum in China - oh, my God! You better not be over here chewing gum.

President Obama has two years left as president. I wouldn't be surprised if he gets to appoint two new Kardashian husbands.

When I stopped smoking cigars it was the biggest mistake I made in my life. So my resolution for 98 is Im going to start smoking cigars again. I gave them up about a year and a half ago, and I now realize that it may have been my one last fun, interesting thing to do.

I think you can use some of those words on TV. But one thing you can't do is throw coffee, I've said it over and over again!

The Catholic Church has a tough new policy on child molestors: three strikes and you're a cardinal.